Carissa

Little Carissa walks along, keeping count of the bricks on the path. She maintains her step size to be the length of two bricks despite it being being slightly longer than normal. A small pattern she follows as if the two tiles in between were lava. Like a snake would bite her feet if she dared step off every third brick.

Her father, Sonny, lets her walk a few feet in front of him, smiling eagerly for his daughter. Amused with the way she walks. Noting her attempts with the third bricks and keeping the fact that, up until then, she had only ever escaped the lava twice, to himself. He takes a stick of cigarette and lights it with the antique lighter he tells people was his father’s but truthfully, was store bought. Why he said it was his father’s is a different story altogether. One for another time.

As they are walking towards home, their house, blue in a a sea of green as if it was an island in the pacific inverted in color with the water steadily grows in size, but the distance always felt infinite. As if each step brought you closer to the destination but farther with each step still. At this moment, Sonny remembers his wife, his island in the pacific, holding him when he reaches the shore of their front door probably smiling with those eyes. Slowly, as if walking forever in a finite amount of time, he reaches the door with the gold inlays against the white paint. He knocks.

Carissa is excited and is practically jumping up and down. She is waiting to hug her mom and tell her about the day she has had. The door opens and Carissa runs in. Sonny stands in the doorway. He walks in…

Little Carissa walks along, noticing the birds on the sky, spreading her arms as if to join the birds in flight. She runs in curve zigzag feeling the air whistle past her ear and remembering the plane they rode on when they visited her grandmother. She laughs as wind hits her face and blood rushes to her cheeks.

Her father, Sonny, lets her walk a few feet in front of him, smiling eagerly for his daughter. He ups his pace to keep up with his daughter. Slightly noting how he truly is getting older as simply walking in a brisk pace is hurting his lungs. He checks the watch, his wife gave it to him for their 10th wedding anniversary. It was 9:49 in the morning. He doesn’t notice, but the watch is brokern, the second hand no longer moves.

As they are walking towards home, their house, white on the green fields seems infinitely far, yet each step seems to bring it so much closer to them. At this point, sonny fears the moment his wife opens the door. The truth is that he is still in love with her and he still wears the watch she gave him, even after their divorce. It’s funny that it takes him an eternity to walk towards the house, but according to the watch on his wrist, not a second has passed. He notices the door, now reading his wife’s maiden name instead of his. He looks for the scratch marks made when his name was removed but the person who did it was good. He knocks on the door.

Carissa is excited and is practically jumping up and down. She is waiting to hug her mom and tell her about the day she has had. The door opens and Carissa runs in. Sonny stands in the doorway. He walks in…

The story above is not two versions of the same story, it is one continuous story. The truth is Sonny, was divorced after 10 years of marriage with his college sweetheart. They had a four year old daughter named Carissa. However, the divorce got the better of him. He lost his visitation rights to Carissa and his job. His alcoholism went full blown and he died of alcohol poisoning in 1984. Above was his description of heaven. One last walk with his daughter.